Living Funeral

I noticed that having a living funeral for myself makes me forget about the social status of some of the people i would invite. If I am going to die, what does it matter anyways? My train of thought overall for this excercize though went from uplifted to discouraging. At first, the prospect of thinking about all the people who's lives I had touched and would have something good to say about me made me feel very sure of myself and happy. However this made me upset too because the idea of death has always been the one thing that truly scared me. Knowing that everybody was only saying these things to me because they knew I was going to die, even hypothetically like this, made me question my life and think seriously about my own mortality. As for thinking about who would invite me to their living funeral, I was happy again. I thought about how these people knew me well enough and were affected by me enough to want me there at the end. I thought that even though it wasn't talking about how I affected them in this second instance, it still made me think about the impact I have on others and overall the impact that everybody has on each other that makes us constant streams of change.